Growing up my family was the one who was always on time. But not only on time but really early. It would not be uncommon for us to arrive at church 30 minutes ahead and be one of the first ones there. My mom instilled that in us from day one even if it was not verbally said. The problem with this is my husband. He was raised in the sense “I’ll get there when I get there” mentality. His laid back attitude which I do like kills me when I am trying to get anywhere with him. He just does not see the reason to rush. Yes I am rushing my life away, I know it. The sense of urgency when I have an appointment or errand consumes me. Heaven help me if anything slows me down getting someplace. It will unravel me faster then a ball of yarn going down the stairs. My husband is one of those obstacles. But it is hard to blame him to much when his own father, a preacher man, has been late for his own sermons. The term “ He will be late for his own funeral” had to have been coined by their family.
I am not too upset I am like this on the occasion where punctuality is an essence. This is probably why I get most of my work done during the morning hours. However by 3pm if you want anything done out of me, you might as well just wait until the next day. The motivation and energy are just gone gone and gone.
Though arriving at church with my husband as Father Tom is going up the aisle rattles me. But to mention this to my husband he would just say “ Well at least we made it” or something along those lines. I wish I could slow down enough to have the laid back attitude my husband and son has. Yes it has permeated to my son. Aren’t I a lucky woman? The only way my son goes any slower was if he was sleeping. But I envy that and I hope he finds a woman in his life who is of the similar notion. That way they can be late together and not give a hoot. Then they can enjoy their life.
My home has a sunroom in the back. When we first looked at this house I was soooo excited to see this and mentally made plans in my head. Then we moved in and well that thought just got tossed out like yesterday’s trash. Instead my husband has made it his office. Lining the walls are shelves bursting full of books. This is not surprising since we are both avid readers. In the corner is his desk where he does his work.
In the beginning it was mostly used to be a TV room for the whole family to gather, enjoy and spend time together. While that is still the case it is not the main use for this room. Instead my husband and son have nested deeply in this space. My son will use it for his gaming which I can’t blame him since the sound system is pretty AWESOME. Once the window pane doors are closed you can barely hear him in there. He will also do his school work and reading. My husband between his books, computer and desk has his weights located in the sunroom. Our treadmill is located in the corner so that is my main use of this room.
However, I have been told not to clean this area for I might just toss something away that is of need to them though the disarray of the room makes me shiver and mutter to myself. But I knew then that it was THEIR room when I walked in to get something and they both stopped, looked at me and mentally said “What?”. I did not realize I had to obtain permission to enter the dungeon or man cave as you will and clear it with the natives in advance. How silly of me. There are times I really don’t want to know what they are doing.
But the more I thought about this room being taken from me the more I was okay with it. For in that room is a man and his son bonding in ways I can’t possibly imagine. The conversations that stop midway when I open the door makes me think that. Something about them sharing a moment with each other even if its my husband telling my son advice on the game he is playing or my son telling his dad something he learned that day makes me feel good on the inside. There is so much going on in this world. Our family is not perfect by any stretch but knowing that they are forming memories for down the road gives me a good warm fuzzy feeling. So if nesting deep in a room that I first coveted as mine is what it takes, so be it. Let them nest.
Earlier in my writings, I blogged about my family and their ability to spew out 1 liners. The ones that would make you just bust out laughing and fall down right on the floor. I’ve always wanted to say something that would have the similar reaction from them. I was starting to feel that just would never happen.
Well one day my family and I were eating lunch at a small mom and pop restaurant. It was one that we visit regularly. The food is great, the price is right and every one knows our name. Yeah our own versions of Cheers. Sitting down and saying hello, my son started to tell me about a story he had heard about concerning the city of New Orleans. He went on to say how a drunk mentioned the nearest ABC store was 5 blocks away. Now before Katrina, there was one virtually on every block.
In a second it happened. My moment to shine was at hand. Behind my husband was Sandra, one of the waitresses who was carrying on a conversations with him. Next to her was JJ who was talking to us. The minute my son finished about the drunk I said “Hell by the time he gets there he will be sober.”
Laughter ensued. I looked up and smiled. Yeah it was just 1 line but it was up there with the other 1 liners of my family. Yip it was small, and I have a way to go but for this particular time at that particular place I had done it. Color me happy.